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    "It's an excuse to dismiss people who disagree with you, because if they are "toxic", then they can be dismissed." - there's a massive difference in how you present it. You can disagree with something without being rude about it, and for some reason I'll probably never understand, disagreement in extremely heated situations/discussions for some reason end up being toxic. Really toxic, not just the "oh no, someone has a different opinion than me"-"toxic". Sure, some people use it as an excuse, because there's always going to be stupid excuses for absolutely everything, but it's not
    – Zoe - Save the data dump
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:09
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    a wide-spread problem. Real toxicity gets nuked, friendly disagreements (with some special flag handling exceptions) don't.
    – Zoe - Save the data dump
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:09
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    @Zoethetransgirl that has not been my experience at all, which is why I posted what I did. "Toxic" is just a buzzword people throw out to end conversations "This person is toxic, get away from them. Ignore them." Et cetera.
    – user316129
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:30
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    If that's the case, you've been lucky enough to dodge some of the worst conversations. There's been a lot of truly nasty stuff out there, and it gets nuked every single time (how fast is a separate concern - some posts live for a couple days, others die in minutes. Really depends on how horrible it is, user activity, and how big the mod backlog is).
    – Zoe - Save the data dump
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:36
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    The problem is, this is all relative, @Zoe. You & I have seen some truly awful things posted - stuff where "toxic" is, if anything, too kind a label. Someone posting a dozens of vulgar insults on SO, or beheading pics on Mi Yodeya isn't "toxic" - they're not poisoning the site, they're straight-up attacking the people. But what about folks who don't see this, because we clean it up before they have a chance? What do they call "toxic"? It's a spectrum, ranging from repeated microaggressions to... Minor social faux pas. And that's where the term itself becomes dangerous through over-use.
    – Shog9 StaffMod
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:41
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    @Shog9 at this point, the word "toxic" has been so overused as to inspire eye-rolls in people who would normally be sympathetic. If someone is being nasty, call them nasty. If they are being rude, call them rude. If they are being disgusting, call them disgusting. If they are attacking people, call them out for that.
    – user316129
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:49
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    @Zoethetransgirl as I've said, SE, for all of it's problems has always been one of the kindest places on the internet I have ever seen, and I go all the way back to telnetting into BBS systems. As for what I've seen over the years, it would shock you. Not a week goes by when someone doesn't tell me that I should kill myself (not on SE, just to make that clear). I usually reply with something along the lines of "you first" or something like that. I have had some pretty hateful things said to, and about me at SE, but it's still far kinder than 90% of the net
    – user316129
    Commented Nov 4, 2019 at 16:52